There was a day when someone spoke to me unkindly for no apparent reason. It wasn’t a harsh insult or a major betrayal. It was something small: a dry comment, a misplaced response—an attitude that hurt more than it should have.
My reaction was immediate… but not exactly spiritual.
I thought about responding in the same way, distancing myself, and justifying it internally: “I don’t have to be kind to someone who isn't kind to me.”.
And there, in that very ordinary, un-epic space, I realized something uncomfortable: being kind is easy when everything is going well, but it becomes a challenge when the treatment isn't fair
Kindness isn't born from character… it's born from the Spirit
For a long time, I thought kindness was a personality trait—that some people were "born that way" and others simply weren't.
But the Fruit of the Spirit confronts me with a different reality: kindness (or benevolence) doesn't depend on who I am, but on Who lives in me.
Being kind isn't just "behaving well"; it’s responding with good when the logical thing would be to give back exactly what I received..
And that, if I’m honest, doesn't come naturally to me
This call to do good reminds me that the love spoken of in the Fruit of the Spirit doesn't stay in words; it’s expressed in how we care for others.
Joseph: Doing good even when the past hurts
The story of Joseph has always seemed impressive to me, but also uncomfortable.
Not just because he was sold by his brothers, betrayed, forgotten, and unjustly imprisoned—but because when he finally had power in his hands, he chose not to seek revenge..
In Genesis 41–46 we see a different Joseph than the wounded youth from the beginning. We see a man who, even with authority, uses his position to blessrather than to settle scores.
He interprets Pharaoh’s dream, warns of the famine, and manages with wisdom. Without knowing it yet, he was also preparing provision for those who had harmed him..
This confronts me deeply because Joseph wasn't kind because he forgot the past; he was kind because he decided not to let the past define his present..
Being kind when no one is watching
What strikes me most about Joseph is that his kindness doesn't just appear in the "big" moment of the story, but through years of small, constant decisions..
Managing well, thinking of others, and honoring God even when no one was applauding.
It leads me to ask myself:
- How do I treat people when I have nothing to gain?
- Am I kind only when it’s convenient?
- Do I return good… or do I simply avoid conflict?
Kindness isn't always spectacular. Sometimes it manifests in a softer answer, choosing the right silence, and continuing to do good even if the other person doesn't change.
The uncomfortable part: Being kind to everyone
This is where the concept gets truly uncomfortable.
Being kind to those I love is easy, but the Spirit’s call is to be kind to everyone..
The difficult person, the one who doesn't apologize, the one who doesn't recognize their mistake. Not because they deserve it, but because it reflects who God is in me..
Being kind doesn't mean allowing abuse or denying boundaries. It means that, even while establishing healthy boundaries, my heart does not harden..
Learning to return good for evil has also led me to seek a peace that doesn't depend on how others react..
When kindness heals more than I imagined
Returning to that small situation I mentioned at the start.
I didn't respond the way I felt like responding. I took a breath. I chose a different answer. It wasn’t heroic; it was uncomfortable.
But as the days passed, I understood something: kindness doesn't just bless the other person; it also heals me..
It frees me from the weight of bitterness, reminds me that I don't need to have the last word, and restores my peace.
Returning good… not by force, but by identity
Joseph didn't return good for evil to prove superiority.He did it because he knew who God was in his story , and that changes everything.
When I confess Jesus as Lord, the Spirit begins to form a new identity in me.
Not perfect, but in process. Not automatic, but real. Kindness is a visible sign of that transformation.
To walk through this week
I want to leave you with a simple but honest invitation:
During this week, identify one person with whom you struggle to be kind.Not someone far away—someone real and close.
Then, choose ne concrete action of good toward that person: a kind word, a different attitude, a more patient response, or even a sincere prayer
. Don't wait for them to change; don't do it just to feel better. Do it as an act of obedience and freedom.
And then, observe what happens inside of you.
An open ending
I won’t always succeed in returning good for evil. Sometimes I will fail; sometimes I will react out of exhaustion.
But I still believe that God isn't asking for perfection; He is inviting me to walk with Him while He forms His character in me.
Kindness might not change every circumstance, but it can change the way I walk through them. And that, little by little, also transforms the world around me.